Self-Love and Self-Directed Kindness

Michelle Obama, Mean Sixth Grade Boys, and Knowing Who You Are

Can you remember a time when someone made you feel worthless? I can. I was in fifth grade, and I had started a new school. I was on the brink of adolescence. My world was changing dramatically, and I was looking for some kind of confirmation that everything was okay—that I was okay. I remember… Continue reading Michelle Obama, Mean Sixth Grade Boys, and Knowing Who You Are

Self-Love and Self-Directed Kindness

Three Reasons Your Imperfections are Perfect

Imagine that a little eight-year-old girl, we will call her Hope, decides she wants to learn to ice skate. She has never set foot on an ice skating rink, and she doesn’t even know how to stand on the ice in her skates yet. But her parents have brought her brand new, beautiful ice skates,… Continue reading Three Reasons Your Imperfections are Perfect

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Reflection Questions and Practices for Self-Love

In my last few posts, I wrote about self-love and why I believe that if we want our life to be better, internally or externally, we must start with love. Self-love occurs when we give ourselves the best and most noble gifts. These beautify our inner life and, in turn, this beautifies our external lives.… Continue reading Reflection Questions and Practices for Self-Love

Self-Love and Self-Directed Kindness

That “I’m Not Good Enough” Feeling and the Compassionate Mindset

Most of us experience a brief and passing feeling at one point or another that we are not good. Sometimes, however, the worry that we are not good enough becomes persistent and recurring. It causes anxiety, self-loathing, and chronic low self-confidence. One cause of the "I'm Not Good Enough" feeling is something I call the… Continue reading That “I’m Not Good Enough” Feeling and the Compassionate Mindset

Self-Love and Self-Directed Kindness

The Gift of Presence: Being an Empowering Friend to Ourselves

When we give ourselves the gift of presence, we are with ourselves in all of our moments—our joyful and sorrowful moments, our moments of success and failure, the moments when we love ourselves, and the moments when we feel full of shame. We recognize and accept ourselves in all of our human emotions and experiences.… Continue reading The Gift of Presence: Being an Empowering Friend to Ourselves

Self-Love and Self-Directed Kindness

The Gift of Respect: Treating Ourselves as People and Not Objects

When I was younger, I knew a girl who seemed to be a really sweet and friendly person. However, I soon discovered that the only time she was friendly to me was when she needed to borrow money. Initially I really liked this girl, and I lent her money a couple of times because I… Continue reading The Gift of Respect: Treating Ourselves as People and Not Objects

Politics and Love, Self-Love and Self-Directed Kindness

Love: The Place We Must Start

For most of my life I have been motivated by the question, "How can I be better?" While I may have had some good motivation behind this question at times, in general I think it has generally done more harm than good in my life. So recently, I have learned to ask myself a much… Continue reading Love: The Place We Must Start